Just Being a Mom

I have a confession to make. Now for those who really know me (or have seen me out and about with my kids) you will already know this and will not be surprised. I am not a good, get on the floor, or outside, or go anywhere play with my kids type of mom. It's just not something that comes easy to me. There are so many times that I put housework, exercise, computer play, TV watching, talking with friends, etc, etc. before enjoying play time with my kids. In fact, even on the rare occasions that I have actually sat down and played with them my mind is always on the other things I could or should be doing instead. Am I proud of this? No. Does it make me feel guilty? Yes. But I always chalk it up to it's just who I am and how I was made. I've recently had a few experiences that have reestablished what is truly important and what should matter most. I have realized that even if I'm not great at playing the games and toys with my kids, it's not important. They aren't going to remember that my Barbie said some really goofy things or that my paper airplanes nose dive every time, but they will remember that I took the time to sit down with them and played Barbies and made those airplanes. The play time spent together does not have to be perfect to make memories.

I have learned that I need to let go of my selfish need for 'me' time. My very wise Bishop said to me not too long ago that "Heavenly Father does not have hobbies outside of his children. He does not go golfing (or in my case play bunco). His children are his everything." Now don't get me wrong, I don't think taking time for yourself and having hobbies is a bad thing, but I have let my want and need for this 'me time' affect my relationship with my kids. When my Bishop said this to me, it really made me think. But, unfortunately I did not change. Then I heard this in conference...

"Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze in the time. It is what God gave you time for."

This quote, coupled with what my Bishop told me not too long ago, made me realize I needed to change my attitude. I needed to put my kids and the time (that is going by way too fast) I get to spend with them first. I need to cherish the times they WANT to be with me because I know there will most likely come a time when their friends, school, jobs, etc. will come before me.

So, this weekend I did just that. I rode wiggle racers with Vanessa, took the kids to the school carnival, played many intense games of war, enjoyed listening to Ally read me stories and just enjoyed being a mom. It was such a fabulous weekend!!! I realized how much I LOVE being a mom! I have some amazing kids! Now, I know it's important for them to live in a clean house, eat home cooked meals, have clean clothes, etc. so I can't totally quit my day job but I am grateful I got to enjoy this time God gave me to enjoy just being a mom!